Grad School: The 3nd Fall Semester

I’ve come to realize that I have no idea how engrossed I get in class until I sit down to write about it, without words that can be found in a Catholic encyclopedia.

This semester was up in the air for me up until the first day of classes, at least that’s how I felt about it.

This semester I finished fulfilling my required number of elective credits (I hope). I’d be lying if I didn’t say I still have some apprehension about it. There’s a level of “done but not done” I just haven’t gotten comfortable with.

The semester was fairly light in terms of workload since I was only taking one class, but other than that it was pretty challenging.

It was a small class, which I typically like. However, the make-up made it challenging for me, sometimes in a good way, sometimes not. I’ve gotten used to interacting with the same group of people in so many of my classes it was an adjustment just interacting with different people.

That alone made class hard.

You know how they say sarcasm should never be in an email? It’s kind of like that. If people don’t know you well, like at all.

I spend hours choosing the “right” words, and it turns out the “right words” and the “best words” aren’t always the same thing.

I can’t really tell you if I learned anything related to the topic of the course because most of my focus was on effective online communication (or at least trying to be better at it). I’m sure I learned something, the results will come with time, not unlike a lot of other topics I’ve studied in these last few years.

At the beginning of the semester I wish I could’ve taken more credits but now I can look back and see it as a nice break before heading into a heavy workload.

In all honesty, I’m glad things turned out the way they did, especially now that I don’t have to deal with it anymore, because it made me realize that I had become too comfortable in terms of how I conduct myself as a student.

I also read books that I actually enjoyed, a feat that’s hard to accomplish in graduate school.

Now onto the longest stretch of work I’ve ever had to do, and if I’m lucky at the end of that stretch will be the finish line (oh God please let it be the finish line).

International Day Of Acceptance

When I started gaining attention for being an “adult with special needs” (seriously that’s what I’ve been called, more than one should), I spent time reading other blogs, mainly seeing if there were any common myths out there that needed to be debunked (not many worth debunking, for the record).

I noticed that a few people, mostly CP moms (as in moms who have kids who have CP), would mention something called 3E Love. Curiosity got the best of me so I checked out 3E Love for myself.

I bought my 1st wheelchair heart tee shirt (& sweatpants) at my first Abilities Expo. I LOVE the sweatpants. I wonder how I ever traveled without them.

I bought my dad his first shirt before his first Abilities Expo, and did the same for my cousin (it’s become a tradition I guess).

Several people in my life have 3E Love products; my dad even uses a 3E Love sicker to cover up a ding on his car.

I was able to hear Stevie (also known as Annie’s brother) share the story of 3E Love & speak to him personally a few times.

I never had the opportunity to meet Annie but I have a feeling I would’ve liked her based on what I know about her. Our shared skill of using kitchen tools as accessibility aids notwithstanding, I’m pretty sure she was an awesome person to know.

3E Love & the Wheelchair Heart were created by Annie (also known as Stevie’s sister).

wheelieheart

Stevie & his family started the International Day of Acceptance as a way of remembering Annie.

Join in the movement of acceptance.

IDoA

*A similar version of this post first appeared on an old blog on January 20, 2014

Sarah Leaves

I used to have a fairly regimented holiday season, and then things changed.

Taking the advice of a former coworker, when things changed that I couldn’t control I changed what I could control.

I leave.

As my mother keeps telling people “around the holidays Sarah leaves”.

As in claw around the holidays throw my stuff in a suitcase and hit the road, or sky, whatever fits.

In fact, I happen to be typing this while sitting in the back of an RV which sounds far more romantic than it actually is. Being a nomad, even temporally, isn’t for wimps.

Why do I hit the road? Because left to my own devices the holidays are filled with memories of traditions that lasted for decades.  I get out of my long time comfort zone of traditions by not acknowledging any, if I can help it.

Where do I go? Well that depends, it helps that my family has spread out in the last few years. It’s not nearly as expensive and much more relaxed.

If I can get a reasonably priced ticket and a place to crash I’m gone.

This new tradition of non-tradition helps in some ways but other aspects are more difficult.

There’s always lack of sleep to contend with but at the same time it allows me a better chance to think about other things rather than what’s still lodged in my brain. For example, it’s hard to get lost in grief when you’re trying to catch your next flight located across the terminal that’s scheduled to leave in less than an hour.

I don’t travel as much as I used to and truth be told I find it to be increasingly stressful but I do make these “pilgrimages” every year I’m able to.

I still get criticism from people for it but I don’t care.

My sanity must come first when I feel depleted or else I just spin within myself and it just gets ugly.

I don’t really leave. I retreat and recharge by changing my surroundings. I get out of my own head and in some cases out of my own way.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting to take a break of some kind, before, after, or even during, the holidays. It’s overwhelming and overstimulating for a lot of people, self-included, naturally. However, it’s much more common to criticize those who acknowledge that they need a break. Someday it’ll be the other way around, as it should be.

One Word: 2017

Build. Chance. Providence. Transition.

What comes next?

Endurance

At least that seems to be calling me.

There are a few obvious reasons:

-Attempting to become more of a distance swimmer, because although a 50m doesn’t seem like a lot of work it can be just as hard as swimming a mile. I need the endurance, literally.

-Although I’ve made it through the bulk of my degree program I’m really just getting to the hard stuff. I won’t be pushed out of my comfort zone I’ll be blasted out of it, no matter how much I prepare.

The not so obvious reasons would be:

-Starting a search that would lead to an actual career.

-Basically become better at “adulating,” because I’m (hopefully) going to be an adult for a longer period of time than I was a kid.

-The older I get, even though I’m not that old, the more energy I need to get things done. I’m not just talking about physical energy but mental and emotional energy, probably even more so than the physical aspects.

-Developing endurance will give me the opportunity to have more time to devote to one thing at a time, hopefully.

“Do you not know that those who run in a race all run, but only one receives the prize? Run in such a way that you may win.”
-1 Corinthians 9:24