One Word: 2017

Build. Chance. Providence. Transition.

What comes next?

Endurance

At least that seems to be calling me.

There are a few obvious reasons:

-Attempting to become more of a distance swimmer, because although a 50m doesn’t seem like a lot of work it can be just as hard as swimming a mile. I need the endurance, literally.

-Although I’ve made it through the bulk of my degree program I’m really just getting to the hard stuff. I won’t be pushed out of my comfort zone I’ll be blasted out of it, no matter how much I prepare.

The not so obvious reasons would be:

-Starting a search that would lead to an actual career.

-Basically become better at “adulating,” because I’m (hopefully) going to be an adult for a longer period of time than I was a kid.

-The older I get, even though I’m not that old, the more energy I need to get things done. I’m not just talking about physical energy but mental and emotional energy, probably even more so than the physical aspects.

-Developing endurance will give me the opportunity to have more time to devote to one thing at a time, hopefully.

“Do you not know that those who run in a race all run, but only one receives the prize? Run in such a way that you may win.”
-1 Corinthians 9:24

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One Word: A Review

“I think this year will be easier to tackle if I just call it what it is from the get go, rather than being in denial for an unspecified period of time.”

When I wrote that last year I truly had no idea what I was getting into, other than I was being secretly overly optimistic.

Transition was my word for 2016.

And boy was it.

All the things I thought might happen did:

-I became one of the “older” students on campus.

-I’m now more an advisor than an advisee.

-My degree program has a new director, who has made me think more about my potential impact for the Church, and in the best way possible (I think, I hope).

-I’ve learned more about myself when it comes to achieving goals.

-I’ve tried to enjoy the steps along the way while keeping the end in mind, rather than let it become my sole focus.

And then some:

-I changed my schedule to better fit the life I want instead of worrying about what other people might say about my motivations.

-I’ve been trying to put school as the priority, which means devoting my mornings to coursework rather than feeling “awake” enough to do it.

-I joined a swim club, and although it’s been something of a culture shock it’s been overwhelmingly positive. There are still times when swimming sucks but that’s bound to happen no matter how ideal the situation is.

-I ventured into podcasting, thinking it would be a one-time thing but it’s becoming an actual venture.

-I’ve actively participated in most of the changes in my life this past year, rather than having the change still occur with resistance on my part.

One Word: 2016

This is my 4rd year choosing one word for the year. Why one word? It’s easier than keeping a list of resolutions & failing to keep them (and then feeling like crap because you didn’t keep them). Last year I had a hard time picking my word (Providence). This year my word came to me early, as in 6 months ago, early.

I learned a lot my 1st summer of grad school and I made a lot of friends. Most of them were further along in the program than I was so I knew that there would come a point, or rather summer, when they weren’t going to be around for wine & cheese nights anymore.

What I didn’t realize was just how soon that was going to be.

That same summer one of the 1st friends I made joked that she was appointing me the new social director. A plan that promptly flew out of the window when word got out (from me) that I would be arriving after everyone else; also there was already at least one wine and cheese night in the books before my arrival was announced.

That’ll show anyone and everyone what happens when I’m appointed to anything (and never do it again).

After everyone left I had the chance to explore campus. Alone.

I took the time to visit the places people had told me about but had no need to visit. I took pictures of all the things

That’s when I found my word and it was only solidified by the last week of on-campus course work, because when people start asking you the same questions you asked other people when you first showed up it’s pretty clear you’ve taken on a new role in your life, whether you want to or not.

Therefore my word for 2016 is:

Transition

I think this year will be easier to tackle if I just call it what it is from the get go, rather than being in denial for an unspecified period of time.

I’ve also been putting things off the irony is, not all of them are hard things, just things I haven’t gotten around to. I’ve been “too busy” among other things. Really I’m just being non-committal about a lot of it. That’s what happens when I approach a transition I’m not ready for, I flop around and make up reasons why I can’t do something right now.

I get excited and look forward to being able to do something, like reaching a personal goal, but as soon as I’ve reached it, or sometimes I just had to come close, I tend to back away. It’s almost like I became so focused on reaching that one goal that creating a new goal and moving on from the achieved goal creates a greater fear than never being able to reach a goal in itself.

This will be my year of transition, and as exciting as it is it’s just as daunting.

Is there anything you do to help yourself deal with or go through transitions?

One Word: Review

My word for 2015 was Providence

Providence (with a capital “P”) is defined as divine guidance or care, God conceived as the power sustaining and guiding human destiny.

When I picked my word for this past year I was being optimistic. My plate was full, so full, of things I had hoped and prayed for. I couldn’t help but be thankful and think God had a hand in all of it.

But I thought having God in my corner would mean that everything would be great and I’d have no problems at all.

Clearly I was more than a bit delusional.

I started making out my calendar for the coming year by looking over my calendar for this year.

No wonder I feel like I’ve been sleeping for the last few months, because on some level I have been.

I thought Providence would mean I would be happy, and well rested, all the time.

This year has been jam packed, which has had just as many bad points as it has good points.

I thought Providence would mean I wouldn’t have to choose between things that I love and care deeply about.

I thought Providence would mean no hurt feelings, especially my own feelings.

I’m sure there are lessons to be learned from this year that will serve me for years to come.

Have I learned about Providence? I’m sure I have I just can’t see it clearly right now. End of the year burnout now comes with an end of the semester near-nervous breakdown complete with lack of sleep & kicks my “screw you” attitude into a whole other level.

My brain doesn’t want to think so hard right now, and I’m happy to oblige.

That doesn’t mean the year has been completely worthless. In fact it’s just the opposite. I’ve been able to do so much this year I wonder if I’ll ever repeat it, never mind if I’ll ever do better.

I’ll tell you one thing. If I’m ever this busy ever again I’ll be better prepared (or at least I hope to be) because I seriously doubt I’ll be as lucky a second time around.

I have had a year of Providence. It just hasn’t looked anything like I thought it would.

One Word: 6 Months

Providence (with a capital “P”) is defined as divine guidance or care, God conceived as the power sustaining and guiding human destiny.

I can’t believe it’s been more than 6 months since I came up with my word for the year. Grad school turns your life into some kind of crazy time warp I swear, never mind trying to have a career on top of it.

You know those people who claim that you can have it all?

They lie.

Its lies. All lies. I tell you.

This year, at least so far, hasn’t shaped up like I thought it would. Then again I probably should’ve gotten specific if I wanted sometime in particular. When I threw Providence out into the universe I guess I was being optimistic without knowing it. But then again no one ever said Providence had to be all sunshine and roses all of the time.

I think I also thought Providence would mean I could have anything and everything that I needed to work out in my favor to do so.

God may be in control but those people who tell you God will answer all of your prayers?

They’re liars.

Well maybe that’s only half true, because they don’t know that there’s at least a 50% chance that what they’ve told you will seem like, if not will be, a full on bold faced lie.

God does answer prayers. The thing is it’s not always the answer you wanted, people seem to always forget to remind you of that part, leading to the false hope and lying thing.

I’m hoping that things take a turn, for the better, in the next 6 months.

At least things take enough of a turn that I can see the “better” for what it is, even if it seems crappy at first.

ProvidenceQuote

One Word: 2015

This is my 3rd year choosing one word for the year. Why one word? It’s easier than keeping a list of resolutions & failing to keep them (and then feeling like crap because you didn’t keep them). However picking one word isn’t as easy as it sounds. In fact picking a word for this year wasn’t looking too promising but it did come to me.

I can thank Arleen Spenceley, more specifically her 1st book (Chastity Is For Lovers) for the divine inspiration, specifically chapter 3.

Providence

Yeah, I know, what?

Providence (with a capital “P”) is defined as divine guidance or care, God conceived as the power sustaining and guiding human destiny.

My reasoning behind picking Providence as my word, or maybe it picked me, is because I’m going to need Divine Providence and a lot of it this year.

What is it that people say (maybe it was Oprah), if you put it out into the universe it will come to you.

This isn’t going to be one of those words I’ve chosen to live out or live up to (or at least that’s not how I think it’s going to go). Instead I’m putting it out there and hoping it will come to me.

If I’m going to be able to pull off everything that’s on the docket for this year, at least what’s on there so far because I have a funny feeling the schedule is going to fill up even more, I’m going to need a lot of help and maybe a little luck.

I’m not complaining about how busy I’m going to be. I’ve worked hard and waited a long time for this to turn any of it down now that it’s within my reach; although now that it is within my reach it’s daunting, to say the least.

So a little (read: a lot) Divine Providence is in order here.